Stopping Abuse

Abuser
If you are physically or emotionally abusing your spouse/partner, you can do something to stop.
You can:

  • talk to a counsellor about your violent behaviour;
  • find out about our PAR group that helps men who abuse their wives or partners;
  • call your doctor, a community information centre, a community health centre, the Victim Support Line (VSL) or a counselling service to get the telephone number of a group in your community;
  • talk to an Employee Assistance Program counsellor who may be able to help; and
  • accept responsibility for what you say and do.

Abused
If you are being physicall or emotionally abused you can do something to get it to stop.
Emergency Checklist for Assaulted Women in Crisis*:

  • When he is assaulting you, call the police. Tell them you are being assaulted.
  • When the police arrive they must lay a charge if they believe an assault has taken place.
  • Make noise: neighbours may call the police.
  • Teach your children to call the police.
  • If you can, take the children when you leave.
  • Ask if the police can go back to your home with you later to get things that you need.
  • Open a bank account in your name and arrange that bank statements are not mailed to you.
  • Save as much as you can.
  • Set aside money for a taxi and quarters for pay phones.
  • Plan your emergency exits.
  • Keep emergency numbers with you at all times.
  • Hide extra clothes, house keys, car keys, money, etc. at a friend's house

If you have to leave in a hurry, try to take:

  • Extra car or house keys
  • Passports, birth certificates, immigration papers, health card, social insurance number
  • Prescriptions and other medicines
  • Emergency suitcase already packed, if possible
  • Some special toys and comforts for your children

*Guide to Services for Assaulted Women in Ontario, 1998.